All you’ve ever been told is a lie. You and only you decide what to believe.
I wish I’d been told sooner that I am solely responsible for my reality. On second thought, I probably was. I just didn’t believe it. Not at first, anyways. Why would I (or anyone else for that matter) choose to believe I created my world the way it is? Nobody in their right mind would create sickness, poverty, or prejudice…not if they had a say in the matter. To do so would seem unconscionable.
And therein lies a piece of my puzzle. Unconscionable: Not guided or controlled by conscience. Were I to have constructed my reality from the get-go according to the wishes of my awakened conscience, such injustices would never exist. Or at the very least, they would cease to exist.
That is where I stand right now. In unfamiliar territory. Or so it seems most days. Living life with an awakened conscience isn’t for the lost dreamer who’s given up on the daylight. It requires an element of bravery, a bit of audacity, a desire to look beyond the smoke and mirrors perceived by my otherwise easily fooled senses.
Take for instance the institution of evil. Focusing on evil and the damage it wreaks has done little to erase it from my world. The more attention I give it, the more weight I attribute it, the more it defines me and my state of being. The more it taints my judgment, until its insidious reach takes hold of my thoughts. Once there it sows seeds of impatience, ill-temperament, judgment, and ultimately…vengeance. Not exactly the loveliest garden with which to impress and inspire others. In fact, such a place looks deathly familiar to the wasteland I claimed to despise all along.
I don’t claim to ignore or deny the grave ills that lie beyond the horizon. Burying my head in the sand and praying for God to make it all just disappear puts me right back in my miserable garden. Only this time with dirt in my eyes. What I’ve learned to do is to pay as little of my attention to the disease as possible without letting it run further amok. I do not bemoan the demons, for they only feed off the dreadful tune of despair. Instead, I put all of my energy toward the vision of the world I desire. To do this, I exhibit the feelings that would naturally come from living in such a miraculous world. Feelings of joy, serenity, enthusiasm, and clarity fill my conscience. If I fall out of alignment with any of these, I do whatever it takes to realign myself with them. I am no stranger to books, meditation, yoga, sound nutrition, herbal tea, the company of good friends, or long naps. I use whatever tools I have at my disposal to heighten the emotional state that exists in the world I see so clearly inside my awakened conscience.
I’ve had to swear off junk food, alcohol, toxic relationships, and most importantly toxic thinking. All of these impurities have only served to cloud my thinking and dissolve my inner character.
Choosing the course of my conscious mind has brought me closer to everyone in my life. The more immersed I get in my personal and unique vision of my world, the more harmony I feel with those whom I share time and space with at any given moment. I’ve seen political barriers crumble in the heat of an argument. I’ve watched the hardest of hearts melt over the mere sight of an act of human kindness. I’ve witnessed the unraveling of countless lies I once held as gospel truths.
I’ve come to learn that the word truth is worth only as much as the paper its written on. Any truth is true only to the extent at which I believe it to be true. I can believe myself well about as easily as I can believe myself ill.
And the same can be said of my world.